Are you a midlife woman who's always giving.
I reached midlife with a realisation that my life was a constant stream of giving. That everything flowed in one direction (outwards) and very little came back to me!
I know, as women, we naturally orientate towards giving, connection and nurture. A beautiful trait that shows we care. However, if we get stuck there it leads to us becoming people pleasers. We feel obliged to give away our time, energy and resources simply because it’s what we think we should do.
Are you ready to receive more.
I’m curious how it would feel for you to receive more? More help, prosperity, opportunities, love, creativity, appreciation and attention?
When you explore the potential for this, what is the energy in your body? Does it feel possible for you to open and attract what you need to feel well resourced, supported and able to thrive?
How you can start receiving more.
The energy of receiving is surrender and release.
For many midlife women, particularly those who are used to being in control, looking after everyone else, and driving things forward all the time, the idea of surrender and release can be scary!
Luckily, it’s not something that you have to do in one big chunk. You don’t have to let everything go and float around in a state of permanent meditative Zen!
Rather you can begin by contemplating this question. “What is one thing that I can let go of right now that will give me more space? Space to breathe, slow down, relax and open my heart?”
In my experience, this letting go may require forgiveness – for yourself or someone else. It might ask you to let go of a situation or person that you’ve been trying to control or manipulate. It might require you asking for help with tasks that are just too much.
What is that one thing that you can release with compassion in order to reclaim your power and your energy?
Moving into midlife trust.
Trust is a huge topic and everyone will have a different baseline of it depending on their past experiences. It’s absolutely hard to trust if you’ve reached midlife repeatedly being the subject of neglect, betrayal or gaslighting. These traumas are big and need unraveling at a much deeper level than a blog.
However, there are some small things that you can do to heal your relationship with trust and receiving.
Trusting that whatever happens you will be okay
I invite you to think back to a really tough situation, when you thought nothing was going your way, that everything was unraveling. I now invite you to think of the gifts that have come from, that situation.
What did you learn?
How did you evolve as a person?
Have you been able to help someone else going through a similar situation because of your own experience?
Who have you attracted in your life because of the way you’ve grown and evolved through your experience?
The thing about opening to trust is that you also need to open up to the fact that things seldom go as you envisage them. However, the end results can often be exactly what you’re looking for! If you look for evidence of how this has shown up in your own life previously, you can begin to trust that you’re going to be okay.
Trusting that you are worthy and deserving of receiving.
Another way to lean into trust is to trust that you’re worthy and deserving of receiving. Again this is a big piece to unravel, but you can start by becoming more aware of what you attach your worthiness to, or what kind of rules you’ve created around it.
For example, “I’m only worthy to receive if I martyr myself. I’m only worthy of treating myself if I lose 2 stone. I’m only worthy of recognition when I finish this project. I’m only worthy or rest when the house is tidy.”
Once you’re aware of these, you can start questioning them by asking the simple question that I have touched on in previous blogs, “can I be 100% sure that this is true?”
When you being to undo and unravel the rules and limits around your worthiness, you can start to contemplate the possibility that you’re worthy simply because you exist. Therefore, you deserve to receive without having to be, do, prove or earn anything.
Immersing yourself in midlife feminine energy
When you’re in the energy of trust, surrender and release, you’re well and truly in the realm of the feminine and all the magic she offers you. You feminine energy is one of possibility, opening and receptivity. The more you can embody this, the more you will start attracting people, situations and opportunities that help create the life of pleasure, joy and abundance you so deserve.